When God chases you

I’m enjoying reading more these days than I ever have before, which sounds odd because reading was my passion as a child and up until college. Once college hit, I didn’t have time to read anything I wanted to read. It all had to be for schoolwork.

Right now, most of my reads are coming from the podcast “The Happy Hour” hosted by Jamie Ivey, which inspires and encourages women to live out their God stories. She is an excellent interviewer and asks her guests what are three things they’re loving and what are they reading. I’ve added books to my list that way, plus the books of authors who have been guests on her show.

I’m actually reading Jamie’s own book, “If You Only Knew,” right now, and I had to pause to share this with you. I’m about halfway through, reading about God chasing her down, and she writes this:

When God starts chasing you, He changes what you want. And in following Him, you find Him giving you what He knows you need.

Has God changed your heart’s desires as He’s chased you? Did you recognize Him doing it?

I had to stop a minute before moving on because that’s part of my story, too, and I didn’t want to miss the opportunity to remember how God changed my desires and how He gave me what I needed.

I had my dream life planned out by the time I was in my late teenage years. I had a plan for when I would meet the man of my dreams, how many children we would have, where I would work, and what ministry would look like for our family. I prayed very specific prayers for all those things, truly believing what I had heard a thousand times in church: “Delight yourself in the LORD and He will give you the desires of your heart.” — Psalm 37:4

I was an anxious teenager and even up into my early 20s. And while I thought I was delighting myself in the LORD — I prayed and read the Bible almost daily and was involved in lots of church ministries — I was missing something. I didn’t have a lot of joy, and I didn’t know the difference. I was a rule-follower, and I thought that following the rules and delighting in God were the same thing. And let me just tell you: They’re not.

Delighting yourself in the LORD involves eyes fixed on Him and a relationship with Him. Not eyes fixed on the rules. Not eyes fixed on volunteering for every church ministry. Not even eyes fixed on hitting your prayer and Bible reading quota for the week. Not being “good enough” for Him.

Delighting yourself in the LORD is wanting Him and His will for you above all else, even if it doesn’t make sense to you, isn’t something you’re thrilled about doing, or is frowned upon by others. It’s eyes so glued to Jesus that when God lets your life fall apart and the dreams and plans shatter that you prayed so heavily over for so long, you can still sing praises to His name because you know He has better things in store for you, things you never even dreamed about. And you’re actually more excited about walking down that road than the one you had planned for yourself.

Delighting yourself in the LORD means you’re willing to hold on loosely to things of this world because you know the greater things are on the other side of it. It’s being vulnerable with God, who already knows you fully, instead of trying to hide your messes from Him. It’s exposing every evil thing inside you to Him and asking Him to transform your heart. It’s living in freedom that comes through knowing Christ instead of the shame that sin brings and that Satan daily reminds you of. It’s believing that God truly works the good and the bad things together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purposes (Romans 8:28).

That’s what God taught me when He chased me. He changed my desire to one very simple thing: Him. I want God more than anything else in the world, and I don’t care if it means my own plans fall apart. He knows what I need to have that deeper walk with Him, so I’ll take walking into the unknown. I’ll take a different story than the one I once wanted. I’ll embrace a life of letting God change my heart each and every day as He transforms me into someone who reflects His love to the world around me. I’ll let Him use my ugly, broken story for His glory, and I’ll trust Him to work out the details of my life.

His plans are greater, friends, and when let go of what we think we want and just follow God, He’s going to take us to incredible places of faith. They may not be easy places, but they’re going to be worth it. Keep on trusting that He has the best in store for you, and let Him change your heart to reflect His own.